i hate cute couples unless they’re 50% me
“blow minds not dicks”
imma blow his mind with how good i blow his dick
My Brand New Dad.
what I hate most about jordyn: she never wants to admit she’s tired, then she falls asleep
if I go back in there after staying out here for like 10 minutes she will be asleep
'my eyes were tired then I got actually tired and decided to take a 5 hour nap'
Perks of dating me: I’ll let you sleep on my boobs
this is silly because if you look closely you can see that the tiger is not an actual tiger but a Beanie Baby, a popular childs toy.
is that true?
i talk a lot of shit for someone who can’t choose rude dialogue options in games because i’m scared of hurting a characters feelings